Is networking all about finding a job?
The short answer to this question is “no.” Traditionally, networking has been conflated with attending in-person events, schmoozing, and trying to land a new role. While some people use their networks in this way, others have gotten a bit more creative. In the digital age, networking has become a new way for people to build connections around the world, exchange knowledge, and get to know others on a deeper level. Here are a couple of ways to reframe your thinking around networking.
1) Remember that networking can be about helping others.
If networking feels too transactional for you, consider using it to offer your knowledge, skills, advice, or expertise to other people — even when you don’t need or want something in return. This can help you connect with people on a deeper level, according to Professor Deborah Grayson Riegel. In her article, “Are You Taking Full Advantage of Your Network?”, Riegal talks about how to develop your “help fluency,” or the range of ways you can be helpful to others.
Think about what you’re good at, what you like to do, and what others often ask you to assist them with. For instance, if you’re a great proofreader, you can offer to help copyedit a connection’s resume and cover letter. Or if you’re a great listener, you can support a connection who might be going through a difficult time.
2) There’s more to networking than “small talk.”
If you hate small talk, here’s some good news: Research shows that most people prefer intimate conversations, even if they’re meeting you for the first time. In fact, deep conversations are correlated with higher levels of happiness and make people feel more connected with each other.
In the article, “A Better Approach to Networking,” author Christie Hunter Arscott shares a few examples of conversation starters you can use to avoid boring small talk.
Instead of: What do you do?
Try: What do you think is the most valuable part of your work — to yourself and others? What problems do you want to help others solve? What aspects of your work do you enjoy most and why? What do you enjoy least and why?
Instead of: What is your current role?
Ask: What roles and positions have led you to where you are today? Which ones taught you the most?
Instead of: Where are you from?
Ask: What places have you lived in and traveled to through your career or studies? Which ones have had the biggest impact on you? Which was your favorite and why?
Excerpted from A Beginner’s Guide to Networking by Rakshitha Arni Ravishankar
